"Sometimes, "happiness" is moving on.
Finding yourself again.
Who you are ~ without that person.
Healing and making your heart your own again.
It's discovering which selfish pleasures bring a smile to your face.
It's focusing on your career, your health, your family, your friends.
Really LOVING and being LOVED by them.
Sometimes, happiness is being alone.
Learning to love yourself and making yourself feel special.
Enjoying being in the company of music and the wind.
Taking in a deep breathe, being aware of the feeling when your lungs expand,
with the exhale, you close your eyes, and nod...
Sometimes, happiness is being alive for another day."
I'm not sure why I "found" this excerpt on this day, but I did, and I am glad. It's reminding me of my past. Not so I can re-live it, or be affected by it, but so I can acknowlege the growth and progress that has taken place since. I have indeed become a lot closer to my sense of self, embraced opportunity, experimented, assessed, almost become engrossed with my own company and enjoyed it.
I have come to find over time that it is in these moments that gratitude of immense proportion is realised.
This day lead to the sad farewell of a great mind, a kindred spirit and a proud warrior. My Grandfather, Pappa. This heartwrenching event has in turn resulted in mass self-analysis. A "step back" so to speak.
I will forever remember his passion for the National Geographic magazine, his infinate collection and widespread knowlege. The chocolate Eclairs he insisted on sharing with my sister and I. His corny jokes with the wit of a genius. His avid commitment to Tennis and his love for Federer. His utter refusal to be driven anywhere and complete adamance that he is quite capable of walking to any destination, irrespective of the distance. The break-in he encountered at his prior residence and total self defense for him and my Gran. His commitment and adoration for her. The swims in Summer. His dark, tanned skin. The tone and luxuriousness of his deep, purposeful voice. His bright, beautiful smile.
My Pappa was a brilliant man. Right until the very end. He will be missed, but remembered as a legend.
I'm not sure why he was always so proud of his grand-daughters, my sister and cousins, yes, myself, not so much. But I'd like to think that as he called me his "Blonde Beauty" will harness the power of the Taylor gene at some stage in the not too distant future.
His Life. An Inspiration Like No Other.
